Regret

It's all because of your fuckin' lame attitude, my friendship almost crumble to pieces!
I am not a person who express through mouth, I don't really use to it as I felt that once everything had been said out loud, the next moment, there's awkwardness. And I don't really use to talking my thoughts to the person involved.
But then..it happened today. So fast that I couldn't overcome it.
We talked, finely at first. But then i got aggressive and messed everything up.
We ended our conversation by me hanging up first.
Oh my god! What was I thinking. Fuck!
Now what? Texted her. And what I got in reply was a cold no need.
She doesn't wanna talk about it anymore..
It's all my fault><
Actually I don't even know what to talk about.
What to solved. What to said. What to discussed..
All I wanted is that you do not know him. That's it. Simple.
How I wish I could turn back time and you do not know him.
You said you needed his number so that I do not have to do twice the job.
But I know. That you two actually still texted each other. Topics? Random.
You do not know how to differentiate the actions of should and shouldn't.
You thought it differently. You think that it's different but actually there's a whole major difference in there!
You just don't wanna accept it or get it. Gosh!
I thought, naively, that we could settle it by tonight. But then...
Everything messed up. You got annoyed. I got depressed.
Is it me that cared to much or what?
Or am I being too busybody? What? Can't I care for a friend?!
It's not just friend okay? She's my best friend for life goddammit!
I do not really wanna see us being strangers in the future.
Please don't let it happen.

Praying hard.

Daughter of Ares